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30 December 2015 @ 01:30 am
Well...this is a pickle.  
Hey guys. It's been a little while since I last made a post and I kind of left things open ended. Sadly there won't be many things answered this time around. I'm still just as confused as the last time. So let's begin with what has changed...

First off, Matt and I still talk every day. We've gone on plenty of skype dates and we also have met in person to go on a real date. We went out to this outdoor mall and we walked around, had dinner, and watched the new Creed movie. The whole date we were holding hands and being really playful and flirty. Matt is a very sweet guy, and very caring, and he likes me A LOT...and that's putting it lightly. We plan on going on date #2 this sunday after New Years so if I remember to then i'll write a post saying how it went. Oh yeah, pretty important too, we kissed at the end of the first date. By the looks of how things are going between us I know that we will be heading into a relationship in no time. This is where the stresses and the confusion still lies with one aspect...

Jeremy is on break and he has a little bit of time left before he has to go back to school. I told him that I wanted to skype with him about something important, and that it would mean a lot to me if we both (he especially) makes time to do so. That was probably 2 or 3 days before Christmas, to which he said that he might be free that very night to skype but that his friend was sleeping over so he wasn't really sure. What was actually a first was that the following day, when obviously the skyping didn't happen, he messaged me saying he was sorry and that the best time we'd be able to do it was sometime after Christmas. That was pretty vague and looking back on it I should have pressed to name a specific day and even time to do it because as of now he hasn't set aside time to Skype me. I get it, it's the holidays and it will be a time to spend with loved ones. I get it! At the same time I feel that if someone you supposedly care about says they want to talk to you about something important then you make time to do it. Whether it's 10 minutes or 2 hours.

The thing about Jeremy is that he is VERY forgetful. Like, he's the most forgetful person i've ever met. That goes hand-in-hand with how he handles the priorities in his days. With good intentions he manages to forget so many things...but not everything of course. So at this point I don't know if I should keep reminding him until he sets aside time, or if I should just let it be and if he doesn't remember then that's just his fault. Thing is, i'm such a fool and I know that. I want things to work out so badly with him that maybe i'm being very blind sighted. I don't know. It's very frustrating. Part of me thinks that if he really did like me then he would make more of an effort to show he's there and that he wants to skype me and make plans to hang out and do things online, since we live far away. Eh. Sure he's a great friend and all but it just really sucks...What do I even do?
 
 
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