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Hey my LJ peeps! I'm sorry it's been pretty much a year since I made my last post. I've had so much happen to me this year. 2016 has definitely turned out to be the best year in a long time. Matt and I are still together and we're excitedly planning our one year anniversary for the end of December/beginning of January. Jeremy and I are still friends and he actually has a girlfriend, which i'm happy about because he deserves someone special. After all that happened between us last year we are still good friends.

Back in August of this year I enrolled in a cosmetology program to Toni & Guy Hairdressing Academy and I LOVE IT! I was so adamant about not doing hair a few years ago, but after a number of reasons I decided to enroll and i'm so glad I did. Even though tuition has seriously depleted my savings account it's still the best choice I could have made. I'm learning so much and I love doing hair! I'm in the part-time program (tues-fri 9am-2:30pm) and I am scheduled to graduate next July if I don't miss out on school days. I wish I could have updated my journal when all of these things were going on in real time, but I think enjoying them in the moment is the thing i'm trying to do now. Anything of significance I will definitely want to document on here. :)

Another big thing that happened is Matt and I went to Rhode Island Comic Con last saturday! It was my first Con and, while there were a lot of problems with how things were run and such, it was a great experience. We dressed as Batman and Wonder Woman and he purchased a lot of collectible things. There wasn't really anything worth buying to me since I could get a lot of those things at a cheaper price elsewhere. It was more so about the experience for me than anything I could have bought. We did share a fried dough though and that was bomb.

There was one thing that made this experience so outstanding...I MET JOSH MCDERMITT! He plays Eugene in The Walking Dead. I didn't even know he would be there until I saw him in his little panel booth thing. Michael Cudlitz, who plays Abraham on the show, was also there but his line was so long. Not only that, but I was debating aloud with Matt and the security woman watching over their lines about who I should meet and what I should get (an autograph was $40, plus a picture is all together $60, and I only brought $40 with me).

Seeing Josh take silly selfies with fans and being so sweet with everyone, and the fact that his line towards the end of the day was next to nothing, I decided to go for it and meet him. I had settled on just getting the autograph since i'd have a physical memory of the experience, but Matt chipped in the extra $20 for me to get pictures with him too. I couldn't believe it! I'll include all of he pictures Josh took with me in a read more tab since he took 16 of them and that would be a lot haha.

All the details of meeting Josh: I got to choose among 3 different promo pictures to get signed by him. As I was waiting in line I was definitely nervous but not as much as I expected to be. That was probably because he seemed so easy going and relaxed that it calmed me down. Once it was my turn in line we shook hands, said hey to eachother, and he talked to me about my day and who else I saw in the Con. I told him it was my first experience going to this convention and he gave me so much props for dressing as Wonder Woman and looking awesome as compared to those that would come dressed in their normal clothes their fist time around. I got to telling him that I had to meet him because I loved Eugene and that he was amazing, to which he seriously loved to hear! He pulled me into a long hug and had the most sincere gratitude on his face. Then he took my phone and we got so many silly pictures! When I was waiting in line I saw that he would take some normal selfies and then get crazy and say that he would pretend to choke the person out for funny pictures. But he asked me half way through to wrap my arms around him!! I was so close to his face that I was tempted to kiss him on the cheek but I didn't want to be weird. I should have though! Anyway, once the pictures were over and I was getting ready to leave his line he said, "I love you, baby" and hugged me again for a long time! I exchanged I love you's with Josh McDermitt, oh my god. And then I walked away giggling like a school girl and I was set for the rest of the day hahaha. Oh also, on the picture he autographed he drew a heart next to my name and wrote "dibs is dibs!". At first Matt and I thought he meant he was dibbing me as his girl but I soon realized that it was a quote he said in the show that he put on all his autographs apparently, and mine was no exception. I didn't even remember that quote until I refreshed my memory by watching a clip of it online. What a fail on my part!

Matt and I did also get to meet Doug Walker aka Nostalgia Critic on YouTube and get a picture with him as well, but that was more for Matt because he was so excited to meet him. I love Doug and his show on YouTube but I didn't have the money to get an autograph. He actually only charged $10 for an autograph and the pictures were free!! That's fucking insane.

Anyway, here are the pictures of Josh and I!
True loveCollapse )
Current Mood: chipperchipper
Current Music: Don't Wanna Know - Maroon 5
06 January 2016 @ 12:34 am
And it's not Jeremy, actually. We talked about it and we came to a mutual understanding that perhaps it would be better to just keep staying best friends. So that's what we're gonna do! But today I went out with Matt again. We made some homemade vegan pizza and went over to his house to play games, watch movies, and...other things ;p. But yes, Matt is my boyfriend now! I'm so happy. He is the more amazing person, i'm so glad to be with him. It feels so right. He's coming over on Saturday to hang out and we're gonna make some bean burgers with vegan home made mac and cheese (courtesy of my awesome recipe). :D
Current Mood: cheerfulcheerful
30 December 2015 @ 01:30 am
Hey guys. It's been a little while since I last made a post and I kind of left things open ended. Sadly there won't be many things answered this time around. I'm still just as confused as the last time. So let's begin with what has changed...

First off, Matt and I still talk every day. We've gone on plenty of skype dates and we also have met in person to go on a real date. We went out to this outdoor mall and we walked around, had dinner, and watched the new Creed movie. The whole date we were holding hands and being really playful and flirty. Matt is a very sweet guy, and very caring, and he likes me A LOT...and that's putting it lightly. We plan on going on date #2 this sunday after New Years so if I remember to then i'll write a post saying how it went. Oh yeah, pretty important too, we kissed at the end of the first date. By the looks of how things are going between us I know that we will be heading into a relationship in no time. This is where the stresses and the confusion still lies with one aspect...

Jeremy is on break and he has a little bit of time left before he has to go back to school. I told him that I wanted to skype with him about something important, and that it would mean a lot to me if we both (he especially) makes time to do so. That was probably 2 or 3 days before Christmas, to which he said that he might be free that very night to skype but that his friend was sleeping over so he wasn't really sure. What was actually a first was that the following day, when obviously the skyping didn't happen, he messaged me saying he was sorry and that the best time we'd be able to do it was sometime after Christmas. That was pretty vague and looking back on it I should have pressed to name a specific day and even time to do it because as of now he hasn't set aside time to Skype me. I get it, it's the holidays and it will be a time to spend with loved ones. I get it! At the same time I feel that if someone you supposedly care about says they want to talk to you about something important then you make time to do it. Whether it's 10 minutes or 2 hours.

The thing about Jeremy is that he is VERY forgetful. Like, he's the most forgetful person i've ever met. That goes hand-in-hand with how he handles the priorities in his days. With good intentions he manages to forget so many things...but not everything of course. So at this point I don't know if I should keep reminding him until he sets aside time, or if I should just let it be and if he doesn't remember then that's just his fault. Thing is, i'm such a fool and I know that. I want things to work out so badly with him that maybe i'm being very blind sighted. I don't know. It's very frustrating. Part of me thinks that if he really did like me then he would make more of an effort to show he's there and that he wants to skype me and make plans to hang out and do things online, since we live far away. Eh. Sure he's a great friend and all but it just really sucks...What do I even do?
Current Mood: contemplativecontemplative
Current Music: Tongue Tied - Grouplove
Alrighty, hello lurkers of Livejournal! How are you doing this evening/morning/afternoon? I have a lot of things to vent out...a lot.

First of all, I miss livejournal. I think I say that every time that I take a small break, but hey I mean I want to update my page when something of significance happens and oh boy do I have some shit to tell you all! Well, it's not shit as in it's the worst news ever, but y'know what I mean.

Where do I even begin? Jeremy and I are still talking, however since I last talked to him about us and if he can see us being more than friends there hasn't been much progression in that. My good friend Max, who is also friends with Jeremy, has been giving me some advice on the subject and he's been talking to Jeremy to see where he's at in terms of like...his feelings for me and such. He told Max that he wants to skype with me to talk about things, and that conversation happened about a month ago. Jeremy hasn't said to me that he wants to skype, but him at least saying that he does I think is a good step forward anyway. But yeah it's been a month since then. I've tried a few times to ask him to skype with me but pretty much he's just been way too busy and/or he can't make free time. SOOOOOO basically I'm hoping that when he can get on winter break within the next week that we can talk about things.


First curveball
- I have been talking to this guy, Matt, for about a month now. He lives about 15 minutes away from me in the next town over and he is serious about dating me and wanting to be in a relationship with me. We're going on a date this Saturday to the movies and to walk around an outdoor mall. However, I don't like him at the same intensity that he likes me. Sure he's a really nice guy and he's funny, good looking, we have a lot in common, we've skyped and called eachother on the phone and that's all been really nice; but I still like Jeremy. So that's problem number 1.

Second curveball
- This is probably the biggest gamechanger right here...oh god okay let's just say it. Max, my best friend of like 6 months and best friend to Jeremy, has had a major crush on me since the day we first started talking. How did I know this? Well, I had a gut feeling that he liked me and I could see that from the start. But Max and I were skyping today, as we normally do, and he was being abnormally quiet. I'm keen on sensing when something is bothering him so I asked him what was wrong. He then eventually told me that he has feelings for me and Jeremy doesn't know about it and it's like...BOOM. The sad thing is that this whole time I have been going to Max and asking him for his opinions and advice with both Jeremy and Matt...so that just really sucks. I have no idea what will happen if Jeremy and I were to talk about things and we decide to get together, because i'm sure somehow in some way that bit of information will eventually come out. Like...how will Jeremy take that? One of his best friends having major feelings for me...it's a weird love triangle.

But that was essentially the major things happening. I mean...I still can't believe that skype conversation with Max happened about 4 hours ago. I'm still in a state of shock to be honest. Again, I had a feeling that he liked me but I never knew if it was legitimate because I was being strictly friends with him this whole time...plus he knew of my feelings for Jeremy so I figured there was no way anything like this could happen. Ha well I was wrong. But hey that's life and sometimes you don't plan for this kind of stuff to happen. You just deal with it as it comes and see where it takes you in the future. For now, i'm still planning on going out with Matt to that date this saturday and i'm hoping that in the next few days or so Jeremy and I can properly talk about things between us.

My hands are cramping from writing this, good lord. Okay i'll end it here. That's really all I wanted to say and update on. If anything else happens from this i'll of course let you guys know!
Current Mood: indescribableindescribable
03 September 2015 @ 03:04 pm
Hey hey all! If anybody is still here then that is amazing and I thank you for even taking the time to hang out here. I can't even remember the last time I made a post here. I've been busy during that time and forming friendships with a few people, and a lot of other stuff.

Health wise, i'm 90% better. I can eat whatever I want now and I don't get stomach aches of nauseous anymore which is AMAZING. God, I missed food so much haha. The only thing now is that i'm dealing with my IBS which is fine now that my GI Doctor recommended me taking Miralax every day for 6 weeks. That's been helping a lot because otherwise the pains in my gut would be so bad. I'm also seeing a Therapist who is helping me treat my anxiety. He's a freaking lifesaver, honestly. I can't thank him enough for what he's done for me.

Relationship/Friendship wise, I've actually never spoken about Jeremy before in a post which is interesting to me. Usually I'd jump at the chance to vent about a crush haha. But he was different. I wanted to take things slow and build up something before losing my mind over him. Jeremy and I have known one another since January of this year, and since then we've been talking every day. I know him so well and we both care a lot about one another. I actually took up the courage and just told him my feelings, and asked him if he could see us being more than friends. His reply was that he shares the same feelings towards me as I do for him, but that he is so busy right now that he just doesn't know if he wants a girlfriend at the moment. So I respect his answer completely. If anything i'm glad that I told him how I feel and that I finally know how he feels too. Aside from that, i've also made a lot of new friends and they are amazing. We call ourselves the "Buttbuddies" and I feel so welcomed into the group, it's great!

Hmm...let me see, I think that's just a summary of everything that has happened in the past few months. Glad I could get my Livejournal caught up! Oh dang...haha Jeremy just texted me as I'm writing this. Better see what he has to say. (Update: He told me to never forget that he cares about me. Damn it why he is so amazing?!)
Current Mood: contentcontent
Current Music: "Woman" - Def Leppard
25 April 2015 @ 05:05 pm
I’m so so so elated right now that I finally reconnected with my first internet best friend after at least 8 years. He lived in Spain and we’d have AIM conversations where he’d be on microphone teaching me Spanish and since I didn’t have a webcam or microphone i’d type my responses and teach him English. I found him on Facebook and he’s telling me that he only got AIM for our conversations and that half of the English he knows is because of us and omg I’m just UGH FEELINGS
Current Mood: excitedexcited
09 March 2015 @ 07:46 pm
For the past few weeks i've been on Ancestry.com to try and make a family tree and figure out who my ancestors were. I'm here to proudly post pictures of my great grandfather on my dad's side and a photo of my great grand uncle with his wife and children. This stuff is so much fun to research!

great grandfather Louis Jacobs
My great grandfather Louis. He was a barber back in his prime.

great grand uncle fedele with great grand aunt Pasqualina and their chldren
My great grand uncle (fourth from the left) and his wife and children. I'm more directly related to his brother Alessandro, who was my great grandfather.
Current Music: We move Like the Ocean - Bad Suns
22 January 2015 @ 04:51 pm
Found this really old meme dating back to about 2009, so I figured i'd answer some questions for fun!

champange supernovaCollapse )
Current Mood: indescribableindescribable
Current Music: Daffodils - Mark Ronson ft. Kevin Parker
19 January 2015 @ 11:23 am
Right, so a lot has happened since I made a post. I'm on a new nasal spray medication for my allergies so i'm hoping that works. I just started taking it yesterday so it will take a little bit of time before I notice any big differences.

Aside from that, Mick and I have been talking a lot more lately. What I realized as well was that what I thought was him flirting with other girls was not really the case at all. Sometimes it can be so easy to let doubts and insecurities get the better of your mind, and that's what happened with me. It actually makes a lot of sense now that i'm looking at this in a different angle. Mick is one of those instagram "famous" type of blogs. All of what he does is to gain more followers and to get himself and his music noticed. So, he follows a bunch of random profiles and comments and posts those kind of "flirty" comments to get more traffic driven to his page. It makes so much sense to me in that way because his sister has the same kind of instagram blog. Like, all of his siblings have a crap ton of followers and stuff on their instagram pages. I just viewed it as flirting with other girls when in reality he has been doing all of that stuff just to get more people to see him. I get it now, I understand.

Snapchat is the same kind of story. He has like over 20k points on there and I bet a ton of girls just send him a lot of snaps because they have seen his music and think he's attractive probably. What I always knew in the back of my mind was that he probably isn't being emotionally involved with any of these girls aside from me. So that makes me feel a lot more secure about him and what we have. He did tell me a lot about his family and the problems it's in and whatever, so he trusts me a lot to be that way with me because he is the kind of person to not be so emotionally open with a lot of people.

We somehow got on the topic of love last night and so I asked him to tell me his honest feelings about whether or not he views us ever being exclusive. His response was "it's something I see as very possibly, but i'm still trying to get my head around distance". Which is totally a normal and understanding response. We'll just have to see where it goes from here. He comes back to New York on the 25th of this January so we'll have to see how things play out when he gets back. Our dynamic has changed a bit because we introduced sexting into this mix, so I think that has made us closer but we're not letting the sexual energy dominate what we have and make it strictly all about getting some.

I'm going to try and be more positive and hopeful and trusting with this. He said he would love it if I were to fall in love with him, I just told him I need to feel secure in what we have before I can allow myself to do that because I have been hurt a bit since we started talking. His response was that he understands and he'll wait. So...it's evident that we have a lot of feelings for one another but the distance is putting a stop from him being fully exclusive. I mean, this whole month since he's been on vacation in England we have been really good on communication. So it's like, it will be ten times easier when he's back in New York and i'm still here in Boston. I don't know, we'll just have to wait and see how it all plays out.
Current Mood: hopefulhopeful
Current Music: She's Lost Control - Joy Division